#601

...and the holidays have begun... boy have they begun!!

I took it easy Friday night and just chilled out alone with a yummy meal, a book and a dvd.. So got up super early Saturday morning - hangover free and energised.. So I visited the Italian for breakfast :) and then went on my way. I dropped in on the Texan - he's having to move and I still had at least a car load of boxes I needed to take off his hands. It was actually great to see him.. I dropped him around to his new house (which is great!) and then stood on his new verandah staring off into the street thinking 'why do they always get their shit together when I leave?' For the first time I had a real pang of wondering if I'd made the right decision - as in I entertained the idea for more then a moment that life with him is great.. I kept that thought process to myself, made my goodbyes and drove away.. there is no going back - we'll just be friends..

Saturday night the Italian and I went to the movies and then back to mine for quite the home cooked tagine! *ahem* if I say so myself.. and then Sunday... now this is where the holidays begin..

After lounging around enjoying Sunday morning the afternoon had a kick start with pre Christmas drinks with friends down at the Powerhouse by the river.. Cut to 10 vodka hours later.. the Italian and I stumbled through the neighbourhood to my place.. all the while discussing (well he listened to me rant and piss talk) about 'what we were doing'.. this was all spurred on by a conversation I'd had 10 minutes before we left our friends.. there is a little consensus that I may be wasting my time with the Italian because of this 'just casual' thing.. I got a little feisty maybe and I'm not entirely sure why.. I'm working on what I want in general - trying to articulate it after a trillion vodka's and a messed up conversation (with someone else) does not exactly work for me!! I like what we are doing but it's still not blowing my my mind

Then there is the next story - my high school sweetheart flew into town today and we'll lunch tomorrow and then I think we have plans for Friday night.. Adonis is back in town Christmas eve.. my a deserted island with a good book and the internet is what I really need..